J says that I have embraced my abandonment issues to the point where I use it as a defense mechanism. We're working on getting rid of that since it's been triggering my panic attacks.
It's true, I have embraced my abandonment issues as a part of me so much so that it's no longer healthy self-recognition but a destructive reaction to my emotions. It pulls me even further down when I feel I'm being left behind.
We're trying to come up with a strategy on how to remove that thinking from my system. The thing is, it's been part of me so long, I don't know where to start removing that mindset. Anyone got suggestions, I'm open.
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