Retail therapy

These past weeks have been awful for me, in terms of how I feel. My boyfriend is emotionally unavailable, my best friend is always busy, and I missed a therapy session with R. I'm feeling unstable and nothing seems to help.

Depression is so much more than just being sad

Depression is so much more than just being sad.

It’s not being able to get out of bed in the morning: not because you’re lazy but you’re physically incapable of moving a muscle. 

Attacks

I missed my last therapy session because I was too exhausted. I only have enough meds for 2 days, so I'll be struggling until Friday, when I've rescheduled my next session with R.

#blessed

With my condition, it's so important to find things in life to be grateful for. Here's a list of what I currently appreciate in my life:

Exhausted

I just spent the last half hour throwing myself in bed, crying. I cut myself with a steak knife. I didn't draw any blood, bu the pain itself was enough for me to keep doing it.

Recovery is exhausting. Being positive is exhausting. Trying to be normal is exhausting.